Monday, October 7, 2019

Yes, but...

It's easy to go through a breakup or breakup after breakup and feel like there's no one out there who is the one for you. Especially when the church keeps telling us that there isn't a person on earth for all of us, "some blessings don't come until heaven." Which is the most discouraging thing to ever say to a person. I got trapped in this thinking a few months ago. In college I started saying, "It's okay, Alvin is waiting for me." Because he was such a good example, supportive brother, and faithful member. Plus the actor who played him was cute.


Anyway, instead of being hopeful to find someone who will support me, love me, and want me, it was easier to tell myself that there's not a person for me here, and maybe that's not God's plan for me. I know He wants me to focus on bringing others to Him and share my story through writing and art. But I think there is someone for me. And not just after this life. I think there is someone who will want me, who will do all they can for me, who will love me with an enduring love.


Having said that, I should mention the theme of my love life lately, which is, "I like you, but I have issues." More than one person has said this to me within the past four months. Which freaking sucks to hear. It's a good thing God made us resilient. I tell my kids about how our bodies are miraculous, by divine design. God made it so that when we injure ourselves (a near daily occurrence for me) our bodies can heal, sometimes leaving scars, which fade over time. It is the same with our emotions. Our feelings can get injured, which can even leave scars, but because of the miraculous blessing of the atonement, we can be healed.




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